res·o·lu·tion/ˌrezəˈlo͞oSHən/
Noun:
- A firm decision to do or not to do something.
(I know, this a partial definition, but it’s the part that pertains to this post, so I decided it’s the only one I needed).
Hmmmm. I wonder why I have such a hard time with this. Every year, I make up this neat and tidy little list of ‘New Year’s Resolutions’, all typed and spell-checked, with cute little artwork printed on cute little paper (meant, of course, to encourage me through the tough times). And, usually for the first month or two, I’m very diligent about it (usually my list is weight-loss or diet themed), and I appreciate the cute little list and it’s cute little artwork…and then my motivation starts to wane, and by April, I despise the list and deem it’s formerly cute and encouraging artwork to be evil, mocking me every time I walk by… and so I throw the list away…feeling like a complete failure. What is different this year? Maybe me…maybe my fear of failure is subsiding a bit, and I won’t be so hard on myself…maybe this year I’ll make my cute little list printed on cute little paper (with art work, by the way), but I’ll actually keep it up all year, even when my motivation lapses…maybe, just maybe a ‘resolution’ should be an encouragement, a bold statement of what you hope for yourself, and a reminder that you want the best for yourself and your family…maybe it shouldn’t be a tracking device for, and ultimately a reminder of, your failures (which, sadly, is what mine had become). When I had surgery in September, I lost a gall bladder, but I think I gained something infinitely more priceless: perspective. I have had such peace and strength since then, and a lot of my former perfectionist ideals have fallen away. I’m learning to accept myself and my life…I’m learning to accept my failures as opportunities to learn and grow (instead of validation that I am not good enough). This is a strange road for me to be walking on…but, I hope that in the new year, I will continue this path, and see where it goes. So, I am going to declare some ‘resolutions’ to the world (well, at least to the beautiful people who read this blog!). Scary? Yes! But, again, this will be an opportunity for growth, not an invitation to fail. I’m excited for the new year, and for my new attitude. So, here I am, taking the first step:
1) I want to choose healthy foods more often than I choose fatty, sweet and just plain naughty foods.
2) I want to read my Bible and Devotions more (like EVERY DAY).
3) I want to go for walks with my kids (not to the park though, that is like punishment to me…I’m not ready for that one yet), and strive to see the world through their sweet, innocent eyes.
4) I want to have self control over my spending (my love language is ‘gifts’ and I get a little out of control around Birthdays, Christmas, other Holidays, and pretty much anytime I can justify buying something for someone…ok A LOT OUT OF CONTROL!).
5) I want to live a life of J.O.Y. : Jesus first Others next Yourself last (I saw that saying on the wall of Michelle Duggar’s house and loved it…I just have a hard time living it).
6) I want to be an example to my husband and children. A GOOD example.
Well, there are a million more ideas of what kind of wife/mother/friend I’d like to be, but for now, this is my list (and they are in no particular order). This is my resolution. I am hopeful for the upcoming year, and thankful for the year that has just passed.
So, how about you? Do you make resolutions? How do you feel when you don’t keep up? Do you want to be a buddy with me and we can encourage each other, and see if that provides more strength and motivation? Let me know!
Thanks for stopping by my blog. I hope you have a wonderful beginning to your New Year!
p.s. I realize this post is a day early, but it’s on my mind, so I thought, “why not?”.